This article is to be read after the episode has been seen, as and as a result may contain spoilers up to the episode that it’s covering, but no further. So if you haven’t seen the episode yet, go and watch it. Then come back and read this. Then watch the episode again. Then read this again.
Meereen looks a bit like Aku-Aku from Crash Bandicoot in the opening credits.
Let’s kick off with Arya’s story in Braavos. We saw Braavos very briefly in season 4, when Stannis and Davos visit the Iron Bank to ask for money. But now we get to see the city alive. So, Braavos is one of the Nine Free Cities – that is, cities in Essos (the eastern continent) that do not follow a king. Instead, Braavos is ruled by a Sealord. Cast your mind back to season 1, and the wonderful Syrio Forel (“not today”). Syrio was the First Sword to the Sealord of Braavos. Kind of a big deal. Braavos is a bit like Venice with Britain’s weather. It’s built on a load of canals, so boat travel is the most efficient way of getting around. We follow Arya as she finds the House of Black and White, the episode’s namesake. This is home to the Faceless Men: the organisation of assassins that Jaqen H’ghar is part of. OMG book spoiler – the old man in the books is never actually revealed to be Jaqen, though there were theories, so this is an interesting turn of events. Side note: one other thing that I did notice is that Arya’s list has gotten substantially shorter…no more Thoros, Beric or Mel, or Ilyn Payne. Has she forgiven or just forgotten…?
Sticking in Essos (it’s a pretty gosh darn big place), we caught up with Varys and Tyrion on their way to Meereen via Volantis. Volantis is another of the Free Cities, located at the very south of the map (Braavos is pretty north). Notably Volantians include Talisa – Robb Stark’s baby momma. Whilst we wait for Varys and Tyrion to catch up, let’s travel to Meereen ourselves, kids! As you can see, this episode saw Daenerys making a tough ol’ decision. The title House of Black and White may well refer to Dany’s decision of killing Maran…Meren….Maranana…I can’t remember his name. Not important. That guy. Personally, I think she did the right thing, though as we saw, it led to a riot between the old Masters and the freed slaves. Interesting, parallels can be drawn here with both Robb and Joffrey: Robb had to execute Rickard Karstark for killing his prisoners, just like Daenerys. Joffrey had to run from the lynch mob throwing rocks and poo, just like Daenerys (though maybe not the poo). What does this mean? Who knows!
Over to Westeros. Once again, Brienne’s bad track record proceeded her. Though, I can’t help but think that she didn’t try very hard before running off in a huff….though it did prove how bad-ass is she is. Notice as well, Sansa’s bird-like outfits, mirroring Baelish’s mockingbird sigil. Could the title Black and White refer to them too, or is that too tenuous?
In King’s Landing, we see just how highly Kevan Lannister thinks of his niece. Kevan is very much his brother’s brother. He idolised Tywin, so you can imagine that Tywin’s death has affected him pretty badly. But Kevan ain’t no fool. He can see right through Cersei for what she is. Along with complimenting bumbling (but wonderful) Mace Tyrell, Cersei seems to be slowly manipulating what remains of the Small Council. She obviously hates Pycelle (who doesn’t?) and is trying to worm Qyburn in there. I’ve talked about Qyburn before, but we’ll have a quick recap. We first met him in season 3 in Harrenhal, where he came to serve Roose Bolton. After Jaime lost his hand, Qyburn stitched him up and escorted him and Brienne back to King’s Landing. Qyburn is a Maester, like Pycelle, Aemon and Luwin (RIP). However, Qyburn was banished from the Citadel (their HQ) for…unethical experiments. What these were exactly, we don’t know. But we do know that he used his knowledge to potentially save a dying Gregor Clegane (the Mountain) and he had a curious fascination with the dead dwarf’s head…hmmmm.
At the Wall, Stannis finally starts being awesome like his book counterpart, offering Jon Snow the goddamn North. The letter that Stannis received was from Lyanna Mormont, who is niece of Jeor Mormont (the old Night’s Watch Lord Commander) and cousin of Jorah Mormont. The letter is pretty awesome as it declares that, even though Roose Bolton holds the North and Stannis wants to take it, the Northerners bow to one king, and his name is STARK. Frickin’ awesome. One day, I hope that the Seven Kingdoms are ruled by the Starks and Martells. WHICH BRINGS US NICELY ON TO:
Dorne. Hell yeah. Personally, the Martells are my favourite house. About 300 years before the events of Game of Thrones takes place, Aegon Targaryen, known as Aegon the Conqueror, landed in Westeros with his dragons and armies and tried to take over. The whole country bent the knee, apart from Dorne. The Martells words “Unbowed. Unbent. Unbroken.” is a symbol of their resistance. Throughout the ages, the Martells have often been pissed on, but have never faltered and always risen above it. They are a strong house, somewhat isolated (both geographically and politically) from the rest of Westeros. Our first encounter with the Martells was through the fantastic, late Oberyn. We know that he was bent on revenge against those that murdered his sister, Elia, and her children. Elia, if you remember, was married to Rhaegar Targaryen, Dany’s older brother. The Mountain “raped her. Murdered her. Killed her children.” But you know all this. So the Martells are a bit bitter. But do they incite open war? No. Doran Martell – Oberyn’s older brother and head of the family, Lord of Sunspear – is cleverer than that. We briefly meet Doran in this episode. He is pretty much wheelchair bound due to severe gout (caused by the lavish Dornish lifestyle, some say). Doran may seem weak, but he is patient. He will bide his time, like so many Martells have before him. Partially, this is why I am so scared for Jaime and Bronn going to Dorne. I love the Martells, but gosh darn I hope those two are safe (this is a diversion from the books so I have no idea what’s going to happen!). We also briefly saw Myrcella (who has been recast) walking around the Water Gardens with a young man, Trystane Martell. Trystane is Doran’s son. In the books, he has another daughter, Arienne. Unfortunately, she seems to have been omitted from the show, but it appears though Ellaria Sand, Oberyn’s ex-gf, is taking on her character responsibilities. So there’s a little history lesson to wrap up this week’s episode companion. Now, please join me in staring at Daenerys’ ridiculous eyebrows until the sun rises.
This article is to be read after the episode has been seen, as and as a result may contain spoilers up to the episode that it’s covering, but no further. So if you haven’t seen the episode yet, go and watch it. Then come back and read this. Then watch the episode again. Then read this again.
It’s that time of year again! I thank you for taking the time to visit. Like last year, I will be writing spoiler free (beyond this episode) episode companions for Game of Thrones season 5. These companions will serve to clarify certain points in what can often be quite a convoluted plot. Now, George R. R. Martin has actually gone out and said something along the lines of “book readers are going to hate this season because it’s so different”. Personally, I’m excited to see where the show deviates from the book – it will be exciting to see new and interesting things and spoilers that I’m unaware of…so, I will try try try not to fill these reviews with WELL IN THE BOOKS THIS HAPPENED!!!. Try. I won’t be able to help myself a bit.
One of the first things you may notice in The Wars to Come was a little addition to Winterfell in the opening credits: it now displays the flayed man sigil of the Boltons. Lovely detail. The episode kicks off with a flashback from Cersei’s childhood, in which she meets a witch called Maggy the Frog (not Osha!). This is the first actual flashback we have seen in the show so far. Interestingly, the books are full of ‘em (see, I can’t help myself), and show headers Benioff and Weiss went on record to say that they wanted no flashbacks, dreams or prophecies. Yeah….that’s…that’s never going to work. For those who didn’t pick it up, Cersei was supposed to marry “a prince” (Rhaegar Targaryen). Maggy says in her prophecy that Cersei won’t marry a prince; she will marry a king. Which she did, in Robert. That is, until a younger, more beautiful comes to take her place (Margaery Tyrell). Robert will have twenty children (all of his bastards), but Cersei will only have three (Joffrey, Tommen, Myrcella). If you think back to season 1, Cersei mentioned to Catelyn that she and Robert had a son that died in infancy – whether this is a show continuity error, or whether Cersei was simply lying to Cat, we shall never know. One thing they omitted in this scene from the books was a third piece to Maggy’s prophecy, which I shan’t ruin in case it pops up….but it seems pretty important in the books so here’s hoping. #Valonqar. In real time, Cersei appears to be becoming more and more paranoid – emphasised in a strong scene between her and Jaime, degraded only by Twyin’s omniscient googly-eyes.
Sticking in King’s Landing, we once again are reunited with Lancel Lannister. Lancel was Robert’s cupbearer in season 1, and played a part in his death. In season 2, he bedded his cousin Cersei before suffering a wound on the Blackwater. He has now cut off his luscious blonde locks and found religion. We also see the return of Kevan Lannister, Lancel’s father and Tywin’s younger brother. Kevan, like Lancel, appeared in seasons 1 and 2 but was omitted in 3 and 4. Thankfully, he’s back, with the same actor playing him. With the Lannister name now in peril, how will this new family dynamic affect their future? There was also mention of the Sparrows, who are a group of pious folk, who we will see more of in future episodes. My qualm with this episode follows Loras’ scene. Loras Tyrell’s sole purpose in the show seems to be that he is gay. It defines his character. In the books (sorry), he is one of the best knights in the Seven Kingdoms. After Renly, his love, his killed, he becomes angry and seeks to avenge him by joining the Kingsguard. He is arrogant, rash, and a total bad-ass, looked up to by Tommen – somewhat mirroring a young Jaime. He’s still a homosexual, but it is nowhere near as prominent as it is in the show…and there is no OlyvAR either. But it has enabled me to use the word ‘qualm’, so I guess I’m thankful for that.
Across the Narrow Sea, we know have two main characters! I’m glad to see that Varys is travelling with Tyrion – hopefully we get to see some super dynamic adventures between the two of them. They arrive in Pentos. Cast your minds back to the very first episode. Pentos was the place where Viserys and Daenerys lived, before they went off with Drogo. The “colleague” that Varys mentions, Illyrio Mopatis, was the large man from season one: a magister in Pentos. It is revealed here that Varys intends to put Dany on the throne. Will be see some Dany and Tyrion action? Goodness I hope so.
Speaking of the Mother of Dragons and so on, what a heartbreaking scene that was, with the Unsullied that just wanted to be cuddled. They are eunuchs – castrated at a young age – so they feel little to no sexual desires towards the women….they just want someone to hold. Which raises questions about Grey Worm and Missandei’s relationship; again, another show-only inclusion as she is about 10 in the books. It’s a nice relationship, don’t get me wrong, but I think it will backfire if they add a sexual aspect to it. The man that killed the Unsullied was a member of The Sons of the Harpy – the Harpy being the animorph for the slave Masters or Meereen, a statue of which we saw being destroyed at the beginning (along with half of the CGI budget – though did anyone else notice the rope graciously caressing the harpy’s bottom? No? Just me. Moving on). The Sons of the Harpy are, as you would imagine, quite angry at Dany for abolishing slavery. Ruling isn’t easy, but at least she has sexy Daario to suggestively stroke his dagger hilt at her. Emilia Clarke’s acting seems to have improved slightly too, which is a plus. Oh, and the others two dragons’ names were finally mentioned in-show: Viserion and Rhaegal, named for Daenerys’ brother and son respectively.
There were some scenes around the Vale of Arryn with Sansa, Littlefinger and Brienne and Pod…but that’s all quite self-explanatory. Young Robin Mumbreast has been left in the care of the Royces, a family sworn to the Arryns, in order to make him more lordly. And to remove him from Littlefingers plans. Which leaves us with the events at the Wall. With proposals for a new Lord Commander imminent, and the captured Wildlings getting restless, tensions are high…not entirely helped by the arrival of the one true king, Stannis the Mannis. As a side note, Janos Slynt, the guy that follows Alliser Thorne around everywhere, ex-captain of the City Watch in King’s Landing, seems to have been given the stereotypical coward treatment. In da books, he was a buffoon, but not a coward (and often referred to himself in the third person, yes he did). Someone on reddit compared this to The Hobbit’s dreadful display of “the funny coward”…I can’t even remember that character’s name as I have blocked it from memory. Anyway, The Wars to Come ends with the execution of Mance Raydar, the King Beyond the Wall. A scene that gave me chills, I have to say. Up until the recent emergence of the White Walks, Mance was the biggest threat to the Seven Kingdoms. He was able to unite the Wildlings under one king; a feat that has not been achieved in…well, ever. Though different from the books, I loved Ciaran Hinds portrayal, and am sad to see him go. This scene, however, was significantly altered from the books, and it seems like they have omitted an entire future storyline because of it. A very cool story line. They have also butchered Stannis; he seems to just care about conquering the North, whereas book Stannis was a lot more conscious about the threat of White Walkers. I’ve said before, but it’s important to be aware that the books and series are very different – it’s an adaptation – but that doesn’t stop me from wallowing in pity and crying “BENIOFF AND WEISS WHYYYYYYYYY”. Either way, Jon Snow’s actions of mercy killing him old friend will have consequences I’m sure. Also I’m putting money on him and Melisandre getting it on. He does have a thing for red heads…
Next week (or a few days ago, if you were naughty and watched the leaked episodes online), we get to take our first trip to Dorne, home to my personal favourite house, the Martells. See you then and stuff!
Happy Father’s Day, Tywin.
I bet I’m the first person on the internet to make that joke.
So, Game of Thrones is over for another year. What did we all think of the finale? Whilst I don’t think that it was Weiss and Benioff’s ‘masterpiece’, as they claimed it was, I did thoroughly enjoy the episode. Book fans have been simultaneously reeling from the lack of a certain scene, but actually I am kind of glad that it was omitted. Without spoiling anything, the scene that was expected is the epilogue of A Storm of Swords, which is book three in the A Song of Ice and Fire series. It’s a major reveal – I will say no more than that – and would have made a great epilogue to the series. However, had they included it, there episode would have been too packed, I think. There was a lot going on, and a lot of twists and turns in various story arcs. Had this scene been included, I think that it would have taken away from the rest of the episode. Now, I just hope they include it early in season 5, as the longer they wait, the less impact it will have. But I’m not as angry about it being left out as I thought I was, and actually having the episode end with Arya sailing away was quite a nice way to finish the series.
A lot of events unfolded throughout the 65 minute episode, so I will try and cover as much as I can, ending with a note on where the characters all are at the moment.
I’ll start with a scene that was quite easily overlooked: Qyburn and the Mountain. I’m sure that a normal man would have died by the wounds that the Red Viper of Dorne inflicted…but the Mountain is not a normal man. It is revealed here that Oberyn used poison during his fight with Gregor Clegane in episode 8, and this is what is slowly killing him. Qyburn (who was once a maester, but was kicked out for ‘unorthodox’ practices) is the fellow that escorted Jaime and Brienne back to King’s Landing from Harrenhal at the end of season 3. He has been there since, and Cersei has taken quite an interest in him, it seems. Qyburn promises that, through his ‘unorthodox’ practices, he can save Gregor Clegane’s life, but he won’t be the same. As an interesting side note, Qyburn was first introduced in season 3 episode 1, when Robb arrives at Harrenhal after it had been pillaged. Pillaged by whom, you ask? Well, the very person that Qyburn is experimenting on.
Sticking in King’s Landing, Tywin had a very bad day. Firstly, his daughter tells him that his family is built up on incest, and then his youngest son shoots him whilst he is having a poo. Deary me. The most powerful man in the word…killed on the toilet. Here we see the Lannister’s real decline in power. With the patriarchal figurehead eliminated, what will happen to the family now? We already know that the gold mines in Casterly Rock have all but dried up, and the Tyrells are sneaking around, getting their mits into Tommen to manipulate him. Jaime remains in the Kingsguard, and as a result cannot father any children. Indeed, it seems that the Lannister line is all but drying up! Whilst I really enjoyed how Tyrion’s story was played out, I can’t help but be a little upset with some minor variations from the book – it is obvious that Tyrion is a favourite; not just a fan favourite, but Benioff and Weiss’ too. As a result, I think that they are, for lack of a better term, white washing him. In the books, Tyrion is a lot darker. For example (I think I mentioned this before), he once had a singer boiled into stew for threatening to reveal the truth about Shae. In the series, we sometimes see a darker side to him, but not to this extent. Anyway, my point is that Tyrion and Jaime’s departure in the series was on good terms, whereas in the books it is not, which both influences their characters drastically in the next installment. For those interested, this is how it plays out in the books (if not, skip ahead until after the nice picture).
****** SPOILERS KIND OF-ISH BUT NOT REALLY ****
Do you remember the story of Tysha, Tyrion’s first wife? Long story short, Tyrion lost his virginity to her, and then found out that she was a whore, hired by Jaime to help Tyrion become a man. In response, Tywin had his men rape her, and paid her afterwards. Skip forward to the present, and Jaime comes down to the cells to free Tyrion. He reveals the truth about Tysha: she wasn’t a whore; Tywin lied about it to break up up their un-(in his eyes) holy matrimony. Naturally, Tyrion is mega pissed off, and then proceeds to tells Jaime that he did kill Joffrey, and that Cersei has been having sexy time with Lancel (their cousin, in the first and second series), Osmund Kettleblack (a knight from the books) and “Moon-Boy, for all I know” (Moon-Boy is a court fool). The two part ways, peeved at each other – with Jaime questioning his incestuous relationship, which had been perfect up until now, let’s be honest. Anyway so Tyrion encounters Varys, who’s like “by the way, that’s Tywin’s room up there, jus’ sayin’.” Tyrion ventures up, finds Shae in Tywin’s bed as the show portrays (though he seems to be a lot angrier in the books and pretty much murders her in cold blood) before finding Tywin on the privy. The difference in the scene here is that series-Tyrion seems concerned and upset with Shae, whereas book-Tyrion is hung up on Tysha. He tells Tywin he knows the truth, and asks where Tysha is. Tywin replies “where do whores go?” before Tyrion thwangs him with the crossbow. Like Jaime, Tyrion has this line repeating in his head – “where do whores go?” – heavily influencing his character and the decisions he makes. So, I for one am very interested to see how their future stories play out!
Continuing on – so Tyrion finds Shae and kills her out in self-defence, anger, betrayal and sadness. I’m not sure what the weird “I’m sorry” was about, but the scene was very well done. He then finds Joffrey’s old reliable crossbow and hunts down Tywin, putting a big crossbow bolt shaped dent in the Lannister’s power. Varys, who is so awesome, then helps Tyrion escape. Varys is about to return to the castle, but then realises what an awful, silly place it is, and proceeds to boat trip with Tyrion. He doesn’t accompany the Imp in the books, but I’m looking forward to seeing more interactions between the two next season!
Ummm next we have Daenerys. Her exploits in the finale were pretty self-explanatory: Drogon, the largest and most fearsome of her three dragons, went and flamethrowered a young girl. Daenerys wisely finally realises that dragons are actually pretty dangerous, and, full of emotion, chains them up for the time being, which is probably going to end really well. Well, she chains two of them up – Viserion and Rhaegal. Drogon – the most dangerous muthafuzzer – is out hunting and hasn’t been seen for days…
In the North, viewers were treated to some brilliant exchanges between Jon Snow and Mance Rayder, before Stannis shows up and kicks arse. If you recall at the end of season 3, Melisandre tells Stannis that the “true fight is to the north”. So how did Stannis get to the Wall? Last we saw of him, he was in Braavos, which is to the east of Westeros in Essos. From there, Stannis could have sailed north along the Westeros coast and past the Wall, before docking and unloading his troops. But why is he there? Well, to quote George R. R. Martin, Stannis is realising that he shouldn’t become king to save Westeros, but should save Westeros to become king. It is important, however, to note that the Night’s Watch swear they will not align themselves to a specific family or take part in any wars besides their own. This is A Song of Ice and Fire, and it appears that Ice and Fire are indeed now meeting!
Further north, you may be rubbing your eyelids in confusion as to what is going on with Bran’s story. We know that he is trying to find the Three-Eyed Raven (Three-Eyed Crow in the books) from
his dreams, and he knowsthat it is something to do with a heart tree, which, as I mentioned before, were symbols of the Old Gods (Jon burnt Ygritte under one in this episode too). They arrive at the tree that Bran has seen in his dreams, are attacked by undead, and then rescued by a Lost Boy from Peter Pan. This character is called Leaf, and she is one of the Children of the Forest. Some quick background – the Children of the Forest, though childlike in appearance, are not children at all. They’re kind of like Halfling elfy things. The giants called them “little squirrel people”. They lived in Westeros eons ago, before the First Men settled. When the First Men settled, with their bronze weapons and what not, the Children’s weirwoods were all but burnt down, and what little of them remained went into hiding. That’s just a brief history – you can probably find out more online, as it is quite interesting, but beware, for the night is dark and full of spoilers. Leaf leads Bran, Hodor and Merra (but not Jojen as he is now super dead) to the Three-Eyed Raven, who appears to be a man caught in a tree. His depiction in the books is a lot cooler, but I imagine the CGI budget was pretty much spent at this point, what with all of Leaf’s fireballs, so I guess an old man in a tree will have to do. Suddenly, Bran’s story has become interesting again!
Holy Christmas is that it? Oh, no – Arya. Ok, so book-Brienne never meets Arya, and the fight between her and the Hound doesn’t happen – book-Sandor Clegane becomes weakened by a wound he suffered, then Arya leaves him to die – but this was much cooler, and a pretty bad arse fight scene. Arya has obviously become very suspicious of people, which is why her tone towards Brienne changes as soon as “Lannister” is mentioned. Despite that, she still resents the Hound for killing Mycha (the butcher’s boy), no matter how many whacky adventures they have had. Arya is now stone cold, and instead of giving the Hound the sweet, sweet release of death, she leaves him to die slowly and painfully. She arrives at a place known as the Salt Pans (hence all that salt you saw), searching for a vessel. She is lost and alone in the world, but still has one hope: the coin that Jaqen gave her at the end of series 2. “Give this to any man from Braavos and say ‘valar morghulis’”. And off she pops.
So, as it stands –
Bran and co. are beyond the Wall, sheltered from harm with the Three-Eyed Raven.
At the Wall we have Jon and the Night’s Watch, along with Stannis, Davos, Melisandre and Stannis’ men, whilst Tormund and Mance are being held prisoner.
Reek/Theon is at Winterfell, where the Boltons have made their new home.
Sansa (going by the name Alayne) and Littlefinger are in the Eyrie, preparing to depart on a tour of the Vale.
Ayra is boarding a boat to Braavos.
The Hound is left dying on a rock.
Brienne and Podrick are still in the Vale looking for Arya.
In King’s Landing, Tommen sits on the throne, surrounded by the Tyrells, much to Cersei’s dismay. Qyburn is experimenting on the Mountain, Jaime is still a member of the Kingsguard, Tywin is dead, and Tyrion and Varys are also boarding a boat to who-knows-where.
Across the Narrow Sea, Dany has chained up her dragons and realises that ruling ain’t that easy, whilst Jorah is moping out in the wilderness somewhere on horseback.
Oh, and somewhere in the Narrow Sea, poor Gendry is still probably figuring out how to row his boat.
I think that just about covers everyone? Apologies if I have missed anyone out.
If you’re feeling a big Game of Thrones shaped hole in your heart, I really do recommend you to read the books. At times, they are quite difficult, tedious, and a tad boring, but overall the story is fantastic and exciting, and gives you so much more depth than the series can. Start with the first book – A Game of Thrones – even if you have watched the series thus far, or else you will miss out. Plus, then you can join in the hundreds of theory discussions online, and, more importantly, gloat and act smug to non-book readers that you have read them…not that I do that, of course. Thank you for reading my episode follow-ups, and I hope that you found them helpful and enjoyed reading them, as I did writing them.
The title of this episode, “Mocking
jaybird”, is an odd one. On paper, it seems to refer exclusively to Petyr Baelish – his homemade sigil is a mockingbird – but usually Game of Thrones’ episode titles have a bit more depth. I’m wracking my brain trying to think of what else this title may refer to (mockingbirds are known to imitate other sounds – could that be something?) but I haven’t really come up with anything, so if you do holla back, gurl.
This episode re-reintroduced us to Gregor Clegane aka The Mountain That Rides. We’ve seen him a few times before, but just in case you can’t remember, here is some Mountainformation. Gregor Clegane is…a beast. He is a psychopathic powerhouse. It is alluded to in the books that he suffers from major headaches due to his size, so is constantly on painkillers (milk of the poppy), meaning that he can probably take quite a beating. As you are probably aware, his brother is Sandor Clegane: the Hound. We first met Ser Gregor (yes, he is a knight) in season one. He fought in the Tourney of the Hand, killed Ser Hugh of the Vale (lance through neck) and was then unhorsed by Loras Tyrell, before getting in a fight with his brother and storming off in a huff. A few episodes down the line, it is reported that the Mountain is out pillaging the Riverlands. Ned Stark, as Hand of the King, puts a bounty on his head and sends Beric Dondarrion to “bring Ser Gregor to justice”. The Mountain actually kills Lord Dondarrion (more than once, I believe – Dondarrion then goes off and forms the Brotherhood Without Banners) and ends up in Harrenhal, when Arya and Tywin are there. This is when we see him next – in season 2. He was recast, so you may have missed him – he was the lanky fellow who didn’t look particularly intimidating at all, pottering about. He wasn’t very Mountain-y. After leaving Harrenhal, Edmure Tully attempts to lead Clegane and his army into a trap (remember Robb scolded him for it?), resulting in the Mountain fleeing back to the King’s Landing area, where we meet him now. Once again, he has been recast. This time, he is played by Icelandic strongman Hafþór Júlíus Björnsson (no relation), who seems to represent the Mountains physical build a little closer than his predecessor did. Long story short, the Mountain is a big, mean killing machine. And Cersei has chosen him to be her champion.
And he will be fighting….Oberyn Martell! Nicknamed the Red Viper, Oberyn is a fierce warrior in his own right, but also very intelligent. He blames Gregor Clegane for the death of his sister, Elia: Clegane raped her, murdered her, and killed her children. He also seems to sympathise with Tyrion – we were treated to a lovely, heartfelt speech about how Oberyn and Elia visited baby Tyrion, and how Cersei was…well, a bitch. When Tyrion was born, rumours spread of this monster that Tywin Lannister had conceived – but the truth was, apart from a slightly misshapen head and arms, Tyrion looked relatively normal. This drives home the point that Tyrion made last episode – he has been on trial his whole life for being a dwarf. Oberyn fights for vengeance and sympathy. Some questions have arisen as to why Bronn “abandoned” Tyrion. The truth is, Bronn, as we know, is a sellsword. He never hides it, and in fact not fighting for Tyrion is very consistent with his character: he won’t do anything unless he sees personal gain in it. He has been married off (by Cersei) to Lollys Stokeworth – a noblewoman and daughter of a lord. And then there is Jaime, who, in his current condition, would not stand a chance against the Mountain. Though as Tyrion said, if they were both to die, that would royally screw up Tywin’s direct lineage, as Cersei’s children are Baratheon (in name, anyway).
Whereas the last episode was the first in which we saw zero Starks, this episode gave us another first: the first time we see the Hound without armour! He and Arya were attacked by Rorge and Biter – the two criminals that were in the cage with Jaqen H’ghar in season 2. Arya saved the three’s lives, which is why Jaqen owed her three deaths. So, to tend to the wound left by Biter, Sandor strips down. Incoming symbolism: when he takes his armour off, he tells Arya the story of how he was burned, leaving him both physically and figuratively vulnerable. This is deep stuff.
Across the Narrow Sea, Daenerys is still being a shit leader. The scene with Daario was a little haphazard, in my humble opinion. This, I think, is largely down to her age scaling from the books, in which she is – at this point in time – about fifteen. Hence, you can kind of see why she falls for bad-boy Daario quite quickly, and might be prone to making rash, cruel (see: Mad King) decisions. It’s just something that hasn’t translated too well, sadly. It all seemed a bit quick and inconsistent with her character. The following scene with Jorah, however, was very good. Remember, the reason why Jorah fled into exile was because he sold slaves for moneyz to please his at-the-time wife. To try and win back favour, he began to spy on Dany for Varys/Robert, but abruptly stopped when he began to fall for the Mother of Dragons. The idea to take back Yunkai is quite grounding for Daenerys, showing that she can’t just conquer three cities and frolic in sunshine and rainbows.
Lastly, the final scene. Sansa building Winterfell in the snow has been a point of inspiration for Deviantartists everywhere since the books were released, as in its own way it is a very beautiful scene. Though fleeting, this is probably the first time that she has felt any notion of safety since leaving home. The cold, the snow, it reminds her of Winterfell. That is, until Robin comes along and gets all spoilt-child-unhealthily-obsessed-with-the-Moondoor on it. Technically he is the Lord of the Eyrie, though his mother rules in his place until he comes of age. Enter creepy Uncy Pete, who has probably had a thing for Sansa since he first laid eyes on her. By eliminating Lysa, the bat-shit crazy bitch, Baelish becomes Lord Protector of the Vale. So, in his possession, Littlefinger currently holds the Eyrie, Harrenhal (Joffrey made him the lord of it), and Winterfell/the North via Sansa. This guy, guys, this guy. Not sure how Baelish and Sansa are going to get away with this though – looks awfully suspicious. In the books there is a singer in the room with them, who is a bit of a tool, so they just blame it all on him. One thing, it’s a shame that the climactic scene missed out a pivotal line from the books – instead of saying to Lysa “your sister” before pushing her out the Moondoor, he says “only Cat”, which in my opinion is a lot more impactful. To paraphrase a post from reddit, this line is to Littlefinger what “I am your father” is to Darth Vader. They probably omitted it to avoid confusion, as Catelyn isn’t referred to Cat that often in the series, and some watchers may be like ehhh? Same reason why they changed Roose Bolton’s line at the Red Wedding from “Jaime Lannister sends his regards” to “The Lannisters send their regards”, in case peeps thought that Jaime somehow orchestrated the whole thing. Neither changes really took anything away from the scene.
Well there you have it. Another week, another episode. The next episode is entitled “The Mountain and The Viper”, which is obviously a direct reference to Gregor Clegane and Oberyn Martell. Another weird title, and a bit of a spoiler. We also have to wait two weeks for it, due to Remembrance Day in America next week. So, see you then!
And ne’er a Stark
Was seen nor heard.
By which I mean this was the first episode of Game of Thrones not to feature any members of the Stark family at all. Which is pretty cool, considering in the first season they are arguably the centre point. I mean, obviously half of them are dead now, so that may have a lot to do with it, but it’s cool to see how the show develops more and more characters (such as Brienne, or even Yara Greyjoy), bringing them into the spot light. This is what happens in the books too – the two aforementioned characters, among others, become point of view characters and we get to see the world through previously unknown eyes. The show reflects this very well, I think, and it’s a credit to the writing. Saying that, there was one scene in tonight’s episode that bugged me, but more on that later.
Fans were treated to a new location in the show’s introduction in “The Laws of Gods and Men”: Braavos.
The city is located on the north most point of Essos (the continent across the Narrow Sea when Daenerys is) and is steeped in history. Topographically, it’s like a Game of Thrones Venice – built in a lagoon, the city is comprised mainly of canals and waterways. It is the richest and most powerful of the Free Cities (Pentos, Braavos, Lys, Qohor, Norvos, Myr, Tyrosh, Volantis, Lorath) and is ruled by what is known as the Sealord. At the entrance to Braavos stands the Titan of Braavos, a colossal statue that acts as Braavos’ entrance and line of defence – it lets out a loud boom whenever ships approach, to warn the city (though sadly I don’t think we witnessed this in the episode). Braavos was the home of Syrio Forel, Arya’s swordsmaster, who we discussed last week. It is also where the Faceless Men – the elite group of assassins that Jaqen H’ghar is part of – are based. And, of course, the Iron Bank of Braavos.
The Iron Bank has…a lot of money. They are currently helping to fund the Crown, who as we found out as early as season one, are heavily indebted to them (among others). Stannis seeks out the Iron Bank’s aid because he sees himself as rightful king and – as discussed in my last article – if the Lannisters should fall, the Iron Bank would lose a lot of their money. Stannis, obviously believing that he will win the war, wants to convince the Iron Bank that if they back him, they will receive their debts. But the Iron Bank does not make investments hastily. Mark Gatiss brilliantly played the role of one of the Bank’s most prudent representatives, Tycho Nestoris (though it kind of just seemed like Mycroft had been transported into another world and settled into a new job), epitomising how stern, meticulous and tentative the Bank can be. At the end of the day, they don’t care who sits on the Throne, as long as it is a good investment for them. It isn’t until the humble, brave and honest words of Davos Seaworth that they change their minds. This is a massive blow to the Lannisters, as they have now lost the funding of their biggest investors. We already know that, apparently, Casterly Rock is dry when it comes to gold, so how will the Lannisters pay their debts now?
During the Stannis story arc we were also reintroduced to the infamous pirate Salladhor Saan. We first met him in season 2, when Davos (the two were old friends) was trying to acquire ships for Stannis. After the Battle of Blackwater, Salladhor resigned from Stannis’ cause. We encountered him again when he saved Davos at the beginning of season 3, before convincing Lord Seaworth to abandon Stannis too. Naturally, Davos refused, and was rewarded by Stannis with a dungeon. So now we meet him again, frolicking in some Braavos bathhouse. Will Davos’ promise of wealth entice him to fight for Stannis again?
Meanwhile, some few hundred miles away, we see that Dany is struggling to rule. Not much to say on this scene – it was all pretty self-explanatory (dat dragon CGI doe). Essentially, Daenerys doesn’t seem to really have a game plan, and thought that feeding and ruling over hundreds of liberated slaves, Unsullied, Dothraki and mercenaries would be quite simple. Naturally, when you take over a city, there is going to be strife. We were introduced to Meereenese nobleman Hizdahr zo Loraq. The names don’t get any easier. Hizdahr is peed off, as you would be, at seeing his father (a slaver) crucified. We already know Dany has a little bit of madness in her, but no other character has really addressed it until now. But if Hizdahr can see it, and has the courage to point it out, how long will it be until others follow?
I’ve noticed that I have ended the last three paragraphs with open-ended questions, so I will try really hard to finish this one with a good, old fashioned full stop.
Now for the scene that I didn’t particularly like: the Dreadfort. Firstly, Alfie Allen’s portrayal of Theon-turned-Reek is outstanding, terrifying, and very sad. But I can’t help that but think that this scene was just a filler to show that- which would be fine, if it wasn’t so poorly executed. There was quite a lot of suspension of disbelief here, and if you haven’t already guessed, this scene wasn’t in the books. Firstly, Yara Greyjoy made a big speech at the end of season 3, and another in this episode, about finding her little brother, which was great. Bear in mind, however, that the Dreadfort is right on the other side of Westeros to the Iron Islands, which means that Yara et al would have had to sail all the way around Dorne and up again. Which is fine, it’s obviously been quite a while since she set sail. But you would have thought that after such a long cruise, they would have tried a little harder to get Theon back? So, they break into the Dreadfort – which is currently the ruling stronghold of the North – pretty easily. Before freeing Theon and escaping, Ramsay shows up – topless (but wearing plot armour), pretty much unarmed, and covered artistically in blood from somewhere. Think back to the Greyjoy words – “We Do Not Sow”, and how much Balon Greyjoy was banging on about paying the ‘iron price’ – that is, kill things. The Ironborn are supposed to be seasoned fighters – especially Yara. And yet they are very nearly defeated by a handful of Bolton men and an unarmoured Ramsay, who, if I remember correctly, seems to take out about four of them. Fast forward. The battle is over. Why the hell doesn’t Yara just throw an axe at Ramsay’s face and be done with it? Ok, so Theon is brainwashed and doesn’t want to come, but after sailing literally half way around the world, you wouldn’t expect Yara to just give up like that, would you? And then, and then, these armoured, veteran warriors are chased out of the castle by….dogs? Really? It just all seemed a bit stupid. Don’t get the wrong, the fact that Ramsay would rather chase them out of the castle and humiliate them, rather than kill them, was very in line with his character, but thus far in the series the Ironborn have just been a joke.
Oh well. The series is amazing put it isn’t immortal – I guess they’re always going to have little slipups.
Now the centre point. The scene that is on everyone’s lips as they weep tears of empathetic pain. Oh, Tyrion! As Jaime puts it, that wasn’t a trial: it was a farce. Everyone, including Tyrion, knows what the verdict will be, regardless of any evidence in his defence. Meryn Trant, Pycelle and Varys all give compelling evidence against the Halfman – and whilst the first two generally despise him, I feel that Varys still has a lot of respect for Tyrion. But then, as we all know, Varys has his own agenda, whatever that may be. It was interesting to see Margery’s reactions too, as she is probably the only one in the room, aside from Tyrion himself, who knows for 100% that he didn’t do it. But speaking up would mean the end of her family, and she can’t have that now. Speaking of her family, lol Mace. Roger Ashton-Griffiths plays the bumbling, arse-kissing oaf perfectly – I just want to see more of him gallivanting around King’s Landing, making observations and writing them in his journal (I assume he has a journal of inner thoughts). Shae’s reveal was as heart-breaking as I dreamed it
would be, but the standout performance in that scene was definitely Peter Dinklage. His deliverance in the final speech was just…remarkable. Tyrion has finally been tipped over the edge. All of the anger, sadness and betrayal that he must have been feeling at this time – Dinklage channelled it into that speech superbly. But here is a plot twist that Tywin didn’t see coming – a trial by combat! Jaime’s face said it all – he assumes that Tyrion will pick him – which, in his current state, could be very detrimental to both Lannister brothers’ health. Then the question arises who will stand against him? As Cersei is the accuser, it falls on her to pick a champion. Whilst you may assume that she would choose Jaime too, I don’t think that he would ever fight against his brother. So who does that leave? She can probably pick literally anyone in the Seven Kingdoms. There will probably be a mountain of knights piling up, willing to fight for her favour against the evil Imp, but who will she pick?
Damn, ending on a question again. I’m so sorry, reader. Or readers, if there is more than one of you. Excelsior!
It’s taken three and a half seasons, but there it was: arguably the biggest reveal in the series so far. The mystery that started it all: Jon Arryn’s death. A quick recap: Jon Arryn was the Lord of the Vale (the area where Sansa is now), and Warden of the West. He was Ned Stark and Robert Baratheon’s foster father, and was the spark behind Robert’s Rebellion – after Aerys Targaryen, the Mad King, murdered Ned’s brother and father, he demanded that young Eddard be turned over too…because, you know, justice and all that. Jon Arryn declined, and thus the rebellion began. When it ended, as we all know, Robert Baratheon sat on the Iron Throne, and Jon Arryn was his Hand.
Fast forward a good few years, and Jon dies suddenly and mysteriously. Robert rides to Winterfell, and Game of Throne s begins. Cast your minds back to the very first episode. Ned was originally going to decline Robert’s offer, until Catelyn receives a coded letter from her sister, Lysa (Jon’s widow) stating that the Lannister’s murdered Jon. This changes detective Ned’s mind – he wants to find out the truth, and protect Robert. His investigation is the basis for most of the King’s Landing scenes in season one, which ends with his execution after discovering truth about Cersei and Jaime. But the mystery behind Jon’s death was never solved, and although many fans may have forgotten about it, just remember that it was the catalyst that started everything!
So here we are. In case you missed it, Lysa Tully/Arryn/Baelish poisoned Jon under the instructions of Littlefinger. There was probably very little love in the marriage – Jon Arryn was quite a bit older – but would anyone have expected the grieving wife? To cover her back (again, under Littlefinger’s instructions) she wrote the letter to Cat blaming the Lannister’s, who due to their past and nature seemed like the obvious suspects. So, if you needed any more reason to dislike Lysa and her sickly child, just remember that that whole thing with Tyrion’s trial is season one was a farce and she knew it. So this leads us into some new territory – what is Petyr Baelish’s game (of Thrones) plan? He has been the mastermind behind it all: Jon Arryn’s death, eliminating Ned (“I did warn you not to trust me), possibly Joffrey’s death, the alliance with the Tyrells. But why? “He would see this country burn if he could be king of the ashes.” He’s an ambitious so-and-so, and wants the world. This is the first time we have really seen one of the key players, apart from maybe Tywin, of the Game revealed. Eeek! Also, Sansa is now going by the name of Alayne Stone, so that no one knows who she is. Stone is the Vale’s equivalent to Snow or Sand as a surname: it is a bastard’s name. Lysa revealed her inner insanity, and proposed a marriage between Sansa and Robin, her little putrid cousin. Pretty normal stuff, all in all.
Ok, enough of that. What else did we see… Well, there has been some debate as to what the whole Cersei/Margery scene was about, as they seemed very civil with each other. But I think they both know what the other is playing at. But did you notice that Cersei also spoke with Oberyn (was nice to see him in a quieter, less sexy environment) and her father? With regards to the former, she discussed her daughter, Myrcella – a topic that she has hardly touched on. Showing some humanity perhaps? And with her father, she discussed her marriage to Loras – a subject which usually has her all up in flames. And what do Margery, Oberyn and Tywin have in common? They’re all linked to Tyrion’s trial. Oberyn and Tywin are judges, and the third is Margery’s bumbling father, Mace. In my opinion, Cersei is trying to score sympathy, empathy and friend requests from those who hold Tyrion’s fate. You sneaky mummy! We also learnt that the Lannister’s seemingly infinite supply of money is running out, with more references to how scary and powerful the Iron Bank of Braavos is. The Lannister’s running out of money epitomises one of the most consistent themes: power resides where people think it resides. So you can bet your hat that Tywin will do his upmost to keep this little dry spell a secret!
As mentioned before, all of the Wall and beyond scenes in these last couple of episodes have been original show-only stuff, and as a result have some book fans a tad irate. But in my opinion these scenes have been great to further flesh out certain characters: we see how devoted Bran is to his quest when he decides not to inform Jon of his presence. We see Jon’s devotion to the Watch, eliminating his former Brothers out of both vengeance and caution. And we see gentle Hodor (involuntarily) kill Locke, who if you remember wanted to kill Bran on Roose Bolton’s orders, therefore strengthening the Bolton domain over the North. Whilst overall I enjoyed this final scene, I did have some issues. In fact, it was all a very large case of deus ex machina. Firstly, the only indication Locke had of Bran’s whereabouts was that he may have gone to the Wall to see his brother. Locke arrives, and Bran isn’t there…but it just so happens that he has been captured by the very ex-Brothers that Jon now wants to go and eliminate. Bran could have literally been anywhere in the world, and whilst I understand that this is a plot device, it seems a bit lazy how easy Locke’s little hunt was. In the same figurative paint stroke, Karl’s (Burn Gorman) death also seemed very happenstance – it just so happened that one of Craster’s wives was in the hut…and it just so happened that Karl then turned his attention to her, for some reason, forgetting about his armed opponent. Maybe he thought that Jon would fight with honour and not stab him through the back, but I don’t know. Just seemed a little bit lazy on the writing side of things. Well, that wraps up that little sub-plot, ending with Jon lighting what is probably the biggest fire the north has ever seen! Wait, didn’t someone else want to do that? Oh raspberries! That’s exactly what Mance was going to do to signal to Tormund et al to attack Castle Black! Has Jon made a big faux pas, or is this all part of his plan? Or maybe this was just an oversight and I’m looking too much into it…? Tune in next time!
On a side note, this episode also slightly reinforced a certain ‘tinfoil’ theory concocted by the A Song of Ice and Fire fans. In the show so far, only a few Kingsguard members have been referred to by name. Excluding Jaime, others you may have heard are Mandon Moore and Meryn Trant. Ser Mandon was the scallywag whom Pod impaled on the Blackwater after he tried to kill Tyrion. Ser
Meryn is the one that fought Syrio Forel (Arya’s
‘dance’ teacher) and frequently beat Sansa. Why is this relevant? Well, this particular theory states that Meryn Trant didn’t actually kill Syrio – Syrio managed to escape (or killed Ser Meryn and is ‘wearing’ his face). The idea behind this stems from the fact that Syrio was supposedly the First Sword of Braavos…you would think that cruel, boastful Ser Meryn would gloat about defeating this great warrior, wouldn’t you? Additionally, in “First of His Name”, the Hound states that a child could beat Meryn Trant. This may just be Sandor Clegane having a jolly jape, but perhaps there is truth it in. Who knows? Perhaps Syrio did indeed escape and he is still
alive? One extension of this theory is that Syrio was a Faceless Man – the same Faceless Man that was Jaqen H’ghar, the super cool assassin that helped Arya out in Harrenhal in season two. This is all crazy speculation…the kind that happens when readers are left for years between book releases, but it’s pretty cool, no?
Also Nikolaj Coster-Waldau’s name was like…first in the opening credits, but Jaime only appeared in the background of one scene. That was weird.
TOMMEN IS TOO OLD.
Sorry. Episode 4.03, “Breaker of Chains”, was definitely one of the weaker episodes as of late, and one of the weakest overall, IMO. I don’t think that anything has stirred the fanbase up so much more than the “rape” scene, but we will touch on that later, as well as how our opinions on certain characters change. I have very mixed feelings about this episode – there were some fantastic scenes such as Tryion and Pod, the sept (pre-rape) and that one bit with Daario…but equally, there were some very disappointing, almost seemingly pointless additions.
Let us begin, as most do, at the beginning. Following immediately after the Purple Wedding (feat. Jack Gleeson as ‘Corpse’), we see Sansa escaping with Dontos, across the water, and into the sly arms of Petyr Baelish aka Littlefinger. It has been heavily implied that Joffrey was poisoned. ‘The Strangler’, it’s called, not to be confused with the 1970’s English punk band. FUN FACT it’s the same poison that Maester Cressen used to try and kill Melisandre all the way back at the beginning of season 2, remember? Probably not. Anyway, if you’re wondering how it got in to Joffrey’s chalice, go and watch the scene again and keep an eye out. It’s awesome. What’s Pete doing out on the sea, you ask? He has recently been made Lord of Harrenhal (that big place where Arya and Tywin were), and needs to “acquire some sons”. He has sailed off to the Eyrie to marry Lysa Tully. Lysa, if you recall, is the late Catelyn’s sister – the one with the annoying breast feeding son. Baelish allegedly took her virginity, and since then she has apparently been infatuated with him, though it seems that he had eyes for Catelyn. Only Cat. So I imagine that that’s where he is taking Sansa – to meet her lovely aunt. I don’t know what he’s been doing since he left King’s Landing almost a season ago though…fishing, I imagine.
Staying in King’s Landing: with Joffrey’s death, his younger brother Tommen is now heir. As mentioned in me last post, Tommen has recently been recast presumably for a more experienced actor, due to becoming a larger character. I have yet to be impressed with this new (see: old) guy, though. For one thing, I think that he is too old. Tommen dans le books is supposed to be about 8 or so. A lot of characters ages have been upped (Daenerys is about 13…) but for them it makes sense: Tommen is supposed to be a podgy, naïve kid who would rather stamp envelopes and play with kittens than rule. Can you see this guy playing with kittens? I can’t. Of course, they may be taking him in a different direction, with his nativity possibly stemming from the fact that, at some point, he needs to get Margery preggos. Poor Margery. I think that she just wants to get laid… Tommen didn’t have too many lines in this episode though, so it’s still quite early to judge. Though I have to say I loved how blunt that scene between him, Cersei, Tywin and dead Joff was – Tywin outright insulting the recently deceased king – his own grandson – in front of Cersei, who remains brilliantly quiet and poker faced. Obviously, Tommen seems like a much nicer chap than Joffrey, and Tywin wants to break him in early. Perhaps Westeros will finally have a good king?
Meanwhile, locked away like the little rascal he is, Tyrion is awaiting trial for Joffrey’s death. The trial will be headed by Tywin, Mace Tyrell (“who will do whatever Tywin tells him to”) and Oberyn Martell. “But don’t the
Lannisters and the Martells hate each other?” I hear you scream at your computer/smart phone/tablet. Well, to an extent, yes. As has been established, Oberyn blames Tywin via the Mountain for his sister, niece and nephew’s deaths. However, Tywin knows that he needs Dorne. Interestingly, this is the first time that we see Tywin actually concerned about Daenerys and her dragons across the world. In the olden days, when Aegon conquered Westeros with his dragons, the Dornishmen were the only nation to resist due to their perseverance and promiscuity (that last one may be speculation…) Tywin seems an alliance with the Martells as completing the so-called Seven Kingdoms, and Oberyn probably sees it as an easy way to eliminate Tyrion Lannister, should he want to. All in all, Tyrion is pretty fuzzed, it seems. The discussion between him and Podrick was heartbreaking, ending with perhaps Tyrion’s only true friend leaving him. The fact that Tryion, who in a lot of ways is quite selfish and scheming, would willingly sacrifice his life (by having Pod ‘confess’) to save his squire’s is a credit to the growth of his character, and indeed their relationship.
So dem’s the good. Now the bad.
The scene that has the internet howling for blood: the rape scene. Some context of how this scene comes about: so in the books, Jaime was not present at King’s Landing for Joffrey’s wedding/death. He arrives afterwards, essentially when this scene in the sept takes place. He arrives to find a disgruntled Cersei, who has been longing for him (albeit sleeping whilst sleeping with about 5 other guys) as much as he has her. The result is a consensual, animalistic sex scene, from Jaime’s POV, next to the corpse of their illegitimate son. Cersei protests at first, as you would if you were about to have sex on your son, but soon gives in. In the series, however, he has already been back for weeks, which completely changes the dynamics. Since he’s been back, Cersei has not touched him. Bear in mind that these two had a super secret sexy relationship before Jaime was captured, so for Jaime to go without for so long, well, one can only imagine! But all he gets is rejection. His blood, and penis, are boiling. Then, when Cersei gives an oh-so-slight, but noticeable, recoil to his golden hand in the sept, that just triggers it. “Why have the gods made me love a hateful woman?”. And then…the series, in my opinion, dun goofed. What follows essentially undoes all of the character building that Jaime did in the last season that made him a fan favourite. But is that such a bad thing? At the end of the day, we have to remember that this is still the man that pushed a young boy from a tower window. This is still the man that attacked Ned in the street and dagger-eyed young Jory. Jaime Lannister is not a good man. But we want to like him, which is why so many book readers are upset over this scene – not just because ‘that didn’t happen in the book’, but because this changes EVERYTHING about his character. Yes, the series and the books are different, but at the end of the day this is still an adaptation of a novel, and changing something this big seems…well, ridiculous. This isn’t like making Sansa a bit more wet, or cutting Strong Belwas (look him up…but don’t read too much) – this is a character defining moment, and as a result, our opinion on (show) Jaime has dramatically changed. Because, as a wise man once said, “rape is never ok”. This isn’t the first time that the show has changed a consensual sex scene into one of rape, however. In the very first episode of the very first series, we see Drogo (who also later becomes a fan favourite) rape Dany on her wedding night. In the books, thirteen year old Daenerys, after a bit of fumbling, let’s Drogo have her way with her. So there’s some food for thought.
Speaking of opinions on characters changing, what about that Hound fellow, eh? That was a dickish thing to do. The point of this (show only) scene was to seemingly show that, like Jaime in many ways, Sandor Clegane is still not a good person. Sorry guys, looks like we won’t be getting that “Arya and the Hound” spin off any time soon! Sandor Clegane just wants to survive, and as a realist (see “everyone’s a killer) he will do that however he can.
Goodness this has been long. Erm what else should be covered… Angry Wildlings? That was a bit OTT, but I guess it just shows their ferocity. These guys are pissed. At the Wall, Grenn and Ed return from the north north, bringing news of what happened at Craster’s Keep. Jon wants to send a party back to Craster’s to eliminate the Night’s Watch Brothers there, who killed Craster, Lord Commander Mormont and several other Brothers. When Jon was travelling with the Wildlings, he told Mance that Castle Black was garrisoned by over a thousand men, when in reality it is only a few hundred. Jon fears that if Mance’s army falls upon Craster’s keep, he will find out – one way or another – from the ex-Brothers there about Castle Black’s real numbers, giving him no reason to hold back: “he’s already got enough to crush us; he just doesn’t know it yet”.
The last scene, and perhaps the most climatic, saw Daenerys at the gates of Meereen. Meereen is the largest city in Slaver’s Bay – the other two being Yunkai and Astapor, which Dany has already, erm, liberated. Meereen is
a lot different, and a lot richer. They send out a rider to defeat Daenerys’ champion in one-on-one combat, which fails when Daario kicks arse and takes names. In the books, the aforementioned Strong Belwas performs the act, proceeding to poo on the corpse of Meereen’s champion, but Daario was a good choice in Belwas’ absence. Daenerys then uses her loud voice and barrels to intimidate Meereen (and, you know, not her three fat-off dragons), causing fear and mutiny in the city. The Mother of Dragons is building her army!
I’ll finish off by just elaborating a bit on something that has been mentioned a few times already: the Iron Bank of Bravos. What is this? Well, pretty much what it says on the tin. The Iron Bank is an extremely wealthy bank…in Bravos…with clients all over the world, including the Crown in King’s Landing. Tyrion, in season three I think, goes as far as saying that the Bank will begin funding the Crown’s enemies if they are not careful, to ensure they get their money back quicker, which is precisely what Davos’ little epiphany was. One way other another, the Iron Bank will have its due.
Well that’s it for this somewhat dark episode. I mean dark as in lighting. Seriously, someone in Westeros should discover electricity. Maybe then they could start distributing music too, and people wouldn’t have to only sing “The Rains of Castamere” and “The Bear and the Maiden Fair”. Maybe that’s why everyone is so angry and aggravated? Ahh I’m so funny.
Murder! But who dun it?
Ok, the ending of “The Lion and the Rose” was arguably the most climatic scene in the episode, so we’ll pop on to that last. Firstly, let’s look at some new characters and concepts introduced.
Mace Tyrell, the Lord “Oaf” of Highgarden. Mace is Margery and Loras’ father, and Olenna’s (the Queen of Thorns) son. We don’t see too much of him in this episode, but what we do is fantastic. Mace is supposed to be a bumbling fool – on paper, he may be the head of the family, but everyone knows that really it’s his mother ruling the roost. Roger Ashton-Griffiths does a fantastic job of perfecting Mace’s ridiculous facial expressions, mannerisms and characteristics; the epitome being the scene where he’s plodding down the stairs, looking so chuffed with himself, to acknowledge his other… who completely disregards him. Also, that facial hair.
Meanwhile, in the north (not the NORTH north, just the north) we get to spend some loving time with Ramsay, Reek and a girl called Myranda. Myranda is a character created solely for the show, though as of yet I’m not entirely sure why. She was one of the minxs that tantalised Theon before Ramsay cut off his todger. In the books, Ramsay has a band of merry men called “The Bastards Boys” who do his bidding. Myranda seems to have replaced them in the show. I’m still not sure how I feel about this, as having a female counterpart arguably humanises Ramsay, and shows that he does hold compassion towards some people. But we shall see, eh?
Briefly we also saw Roose Bolton’s new wife, Fat Walda. If you cast your minds back to episode 3.09 (prior to the Red Wedding), Roose explains to Catelyn that Walder Frey said that if Roose would marry one of his daughters or granddaughters, he could have her weight in gold. So, Roose, the sneaky devil, chose the fattest one he could find. Oh Fat Walda, you don’t know what you’ve gotten yourself in to…
M’kay, scene and themes breakdown. Firstly, Alfie Allen’s portrayal of Reek was…incredible. Every tiny movement was thought out – the way he hobbled along during the forest, the way he barely looks Roose or Ramsay in the eye, and the sheer heartbreak you see on his face when he learns of Robb’s fate. There has been some criticism that his transition from Theon to Reek was too rapid, but I don’t think there was really any other way they could show the ‘brainwashing’ without it getting boring and tedious. I mean, judging from the state that Theon was in at the end of the last season, you can imagine how much torture he must have gone through up to this point.
Staying with the Boltons (sounds like a sitcom), it was great seeing some interactions between Roose and Ramsay. Ramsay seems to have major daddy issues, and is constantly reminded that he is a Snow, not a Bolton. Parallels can be drawn here with Oberyn and Ellaria Sand discussing bastards with Cersei and Tywin in King’s Landing: “bastards are born of passion”. Dorne has a completely different way of looking at bastards compared to the rest of Westeros. Just look at Jon, for example. He joined the Night’s Watch because he knew that, as a bastard, he would inherit nothing, and become nothing. Ramsey probably feels the same way. Bastards are frowned upon in the majority of Westeros, whereas in Dorne they are accepted for who they are, not what they are.
Over on Dragonstone, we were reintroduced to Stannis’ lovely wife Selyse, and get a deeper look into his belief in Melisandre’s god. The scene opened with some sacrificial burnings. No biggie. One of the lucky chosen was Selyse’s brother, Axell Florent. It’s becoming clearer and clearer that Stannis is becoming obsessed with obtaining the Iron Throne through any means. He seems Melisandre as his key, and doesn’t seem to mind if he has to use black magic to obtain his goal. I mean, we’ve already seen Melisandre birth Shadow Baby, so what else is she capable of?
In the north north north north, Bran is becoming a moody teenager who just wants to be a wolf. The three that he caresses is a weirwood tree (also known as a heart tree). These trees have been mentioned a few times (one appears prominently in Winterfell) as they are remnants of the Old Gods. The trees all have faces carved into them, which, combined with the blood-red sap, makes them look like they are crying. Upon touching the tree, Bran is presented with a strange and interesting vision that hasn’t been getting enough internet attention!! This is Game of Thrones, so one can assume that all the visions had some significance somehow: Ned in the black cells, Ned honing Ice, Bran falling, the three-eyed raven, the crowstorm from when Sam killed the White Walker, the undead horse, and, perhaps most prominent, King’s Landing: once covered by the shadow of a dragon, and again in the throne room. This one, if you remember, is exactly the same as Daenerys’ vision at the end of season 2 – the Red Keep, destroyed, coated in snow (or perhaps ash?), in ruins. Is Bran seeing what is to come, what may come, or what has come? Either way, a voice spoke out to him, and now he must continue north north north north…north.
Alright, King’s Landing. It’s wedding day. And OH MY GOD SO MUCH FORESHADOWING. Let’s firstly pay quick homage to the scene between Jaime and Bronn sparring. In the books, Jaime enlists the help of mute Ilyn Payne (the King’s Justice), but tragically, Payne’s actor, musician Wilko Johnson, has terminal cancer and will not be reprising his role. The choice to have Bronn step up to the mark, however, was a great one by the show’s writers. At this point in the books, Bronn kind of drifts off into the background, for the most part. But Jerome Flynn’s portrayal of the sellsword has been brilliant, and it makes sense for him to remain in King’s Landing as a semi-prominent role: Jaime needs someone who will be discreet – if word got out that he could no longer fight, he would lose his dignity and what little remains of his honour. That, or if his king died whilst he was supposed to be protecting him. Oops. Plus, we get to see some awesome banter between him and Jaime.
Ok, right, the Purple Wedding. I think that a lot of respect needs to be paid to everyone that made this scene possible. It’s shot in real time, and features (I think) the most members of cast in one place at a time. It managed to jump from character to character, without feeling disjointed or erred. It would have been nice to see more of the actual wedding, but the afterparty was where it’s at. So, Joffrey’s dead, eh? That makeup was outstanding. In fact, that whole scene in general was just…ahh. I imagine his death was met with screams of both joy and regret – joy because he is an evil bastard (heh) and regret because he’s such a good character, and Jack Gleeson played him brilliantly. It’s a shame to see such a talented actor go: it’s something really special to make an entire fan base absolutely loath and despise you! Jaime and Brienne’s inclusion at the wedding was interesting too, as in the books they’re not near King’s Landing at this point. Though one thing that did bug me was Brienne’s lack of interaction with Sansa – you’d think that she would at least acknowledge her, maybe mention her mother or something, instead of just walking straight past her. But Jaime’s presence added a new level of emotion: as mentioned, all he can do now is protect the king. I think that he is aware that Joffrey is his son, but his sprint to the dying king’s side wasn’t out of love for a child – it was because he knew that this was his one task, his one duty, his one chance to redeem himself. And he failed. That’s just my opinion anyway. Having a ‘villain’ die can often feel a bit clichéd, but this scene was written and shot in such a way that, in the end, we’re looking at a scared child, looking to his mother to help, and she watches her firstborn die in her arms. It really humanised both Cersei and Joffrey, even if for only a second. Sidenote, on recasting, that blond boy sat next to Cersei was Tommen, the youngest of Cersei and
Robert’s Jaime’s children. He was played by a different actor in previous seasons, but has recently been replaced. The actor playing him now actually played Martyn Lannister – one of the children that Robb captured before Rickard Karstark murdered them.
So, who did it, and how was it done? Was it Tyrion? What about Sansa, escaping with Dontos at the end? Could it have been Oberyn, with his hatred for Lannisters and knowledge of poison? Or the Tyrells, perhaps? Tywin, wanting to be rid of a useless king? Maybe Melisandre and her leeches – remember them? If you would like to find out, there have been a few explanations as to how it was brilliantly done and filmed online, such as this one nyah – http://imgur.com/a/2DtPH (click at your own risk!).
So that’s it for “The Lion and the Rose”. Next week’s episode, entitled “Breaker of Chains”, will have Westeros realling in the aftermath of the Purple Wedding. Who sits on the Iron Throne now? Dun dun duuuuun.
Also, don’t go to a wedding in Westeros.
Let’s kick off with the big new characters introduced in this first episode of the new season (squee). As the Game of Thrones cast is so big, it can sometimes be difficult to keep track of who everyone is in relation to whom.
So here we go. Let’s start with arguably this season’s most prominent new character, the Red Viper himself, Oberyn Martell. The Martell’s are the presiding family over Dorne, located at the very south of Westeros. The lord of Dorne is Doran Martell, who suffers from gout, and is rarely seen in public as a result. The men of the Martell family are also known as ‘princes’, though this is just Dornish custom, and essentially has the same meaning as ‘lord’. Oh, Dorne is also where Myrcella (Joff’s younger sister) was sent in season 2, to be betrothed to Doran’s son. Oberyn is a fan favourite, as well as one of my own, and is often described as a ‘wild card’. He’s a sexual deviant, fathering many bastards, and hell-bent on seeking revenge for the death of his sister at the hands of Gregor Clegane, the Mountain. His sister was Elia Martell, who was married to good old Rhaegar Targaryen before he ran off with Lyanna Stark. Marriage, guys; it’s complicated. Also Oberyn’s paramour, Ellaria (not to be confused with Elia!) is a bastard – her surname is Sand. Obvs King’s Landing frowns upon bastards at court, so this will be fun to watch.
We were also introduced to Styr, the Magnar (leader) of a group of Wildlings from a place called Thenn. He was the big Xerxes-looking guy, with the bald, scarred head and crazy eyes. Since Jonathan killed Orel (Mackenzie Crook) last season, the Wildlings south of the Wall don’t have a Scooby as to where they are going, so the Thenns have come to lend a not-so-helping hand. These guys are terrifying. Interestingly, in the books these guys aren’t cannibals, and are actually implied to be a lot more civil than the rest of the Wildlings, so it will be interesting to see the developments in their characters.
Now some recurring characters who we haven’t seen in a while! The drunk guy that was following Sansa is Dontos Hollard. Cast your minds back to the very first episode of season 2 – Dontos was the knight that was too drunk to fight at Joffrey’s name day, so Joff tried to kill him. Sansa spoke up and Dontos was made the serve as the court’s fool instead. He just stopped to say hello. At the Wall, Jon was seen speaking in front of a board of Night’s Watch members, including Alliser Thorne (the guy that made Jon’s life hell in the first season), and Janos Slynt, who was the old commander of the City Watch at King’s Landing, before Tyrion sends him to the Wall for betraying Ned. Oh Ned…. Lastly, in the climactic scene of the episode, we see an old friend of Arya’s, Polliver. This was the guy who killed Lommy and took Needle from Arya back in season 2. God that last scene was awesome. And has sprouted various Sandor Clegane-chicken memes. Rightly so.
One last shout out to a recast: Daario Naharis. He was introduced at the end of season 3, played by actor Ed Skrein, but was recast after Skrein went on to pursue other things. I’m still not sure how I feel about this – Michiel Huisman seems like a better actor, but I miss Skrein’s smarminess. And something about Huisman just makes him look like generic guard #5. Still, it’s early days to judge.
The title of the episode – “Two Swords” – comes from the opening scene, where we see Ned Stark’s fat off greatsword Ice melted down into two brand new Valyrian Steel swords. One went to Jaime, and the other….?
Overall this was a great first episode to what promises to be an outstanding season. The speech-less opening was very powerful, and symbolised the Lannister triumph over the Starks, whilst the end scene almost represented the opposite: one Stark sword is lost; another is gained. The Hound was hilarious, and you can real feel Tyrion’s growing disdain for his family. Also Jaime picked up on Cersei’s drinking. Well, someone needs to tell her. I didn’t really like how Oberyn’s ‘characteristics’ were almost spoon-fed to the audience though – oh, he’s in a brothel. Oh he’s obviously in an open relationship. Oh he’s bi too. Oh and he wants to kill every Lannister he sees? Still, Oberyn’s character goes a lot deeper than that, so maybe this was just a preliminary introduction to establish his nature: he will either kill you, or have sex with you. Soon we will see why House Martell is so freaking awesome. Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken.